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It's 9pm. Then 10pm. Then 11pm. Your child is still awake: wired, restless, calling out, or sneaking out of bed. Bedtime with a neurodivergent child can feel like the hardest part of the day, happening at the point when you have the least energy left.
They're not fighting bedtime to be difficult. Their brain simply doesn't have an off switch yet.
ADHD brains struggle to 'switch off'. The same brain that can't focus during maths class can't stop thinking at bedtime. Autistic children may have differences in melatonin production. Sensory sensitivities mean sheets feel wrong, the room is too bright, or that tiny noise from the boiler is deafening. Anxiety about the next day adds another layer.
Set a non-negotiable wind-down period 30 minutes before bed. Screens off (the blue light genuinely disrupts melatonin). Dim the lights. Offer calm activities: colouring, audiobooks, gentle stretching, or a warm bath. Follow the SAME sequence every single night. Predictability is your friend. The body learns to associate these cues with sleep.
A weighted blanket can work wonders for sensory-seeking children because the deep pressure is calming. Black-out blinds for light sensitivity. Some children find a fan or calming nature sounds helpful for auditory sensitivity, though note that white noise is still a form of stimulation and doesn't suit everyone. Silence may work better. Cool, breathable pyjamas with no tags. Some children sleep better with a body pillow or in a 'nest' of cushions. Experiment and track what works.
If you've tried everything and your child still can't settle, speak to your GP about melatonin. It's not a sleeping pill. It simply tops up the hormone that signals 'time to sleep'. Many neurodivergent children have naturally lower melatonin levels. It can be genuinely life-changing when combined with good sleep hygiene. Always consult a medical professional before using supplements.
